Fear and reasons of procrastination

Today I started using a work-log program. I am not sure it is gonna help but I think it is better then doing nothing about it. The truth is that recently I have been having a lot of ideas, a lot of interests in very different projects. And everyday I input (or want to) input even more data into my small brain by reading various super interesting resources (Founders at Work, Leadership Challenge..). But the truth is….it is too much and I feel trapped.

I am scrared everyday to not be productive enough. I am scared every minute that I amnot doing the most important thing I am suppose to do. It is paralysing, it makes me procrastinate…a lot!

A good advice would be: give yourself a break, dont put som much pressure on yourself! True, I try this one…Didn't really work out. Everytime the exact same question come back again and again: What do you really want to be doing?
And everyday I think to myself "Tonight I will think seriously about it!". And every night I find another place to put my focus on. At least working a things make me progress, a little bit.
I remember my friend telling to me just recently "My problem before was that I spend to much time thinking about thing, and not doing any progress. At that moment it is a good time to stop thinking and just do…eventually the answer you are looking for will come naturally". So every night, I dont think and I do stuff. But it would be clever to know what I spend my time doing and make a review, at the end of the week, or the month and see what project I spend most time on. Can maybe be an indicator of what I like to do most.

I use the term "project" because it sound fancy, but actually I could have call them "stuff", that include: blogging, making connections for my incubation idea in my home town 2 years form now (ex: Yesterday I wrote an interview of myself that might be published in a newsletter of Chinese business from Reunion Island, if it gets publish, it is a good way to get in touch with a very powerful lobby group in my hometown), iWeekend, developing my own online service…

So these are the "projects". New appear and disappear everyday.
But then there are the "tasks", things I want to do – or just do- without necessarily knowing what is the aim. Ex: Reading Founders at Work. Cool it is interesting but isnt it a way to procrastinate and not getting started? Like the testimony of this guy who spend 1 year attending start-up event to "prepare himself" until he realize he should have started straight away and would have learnt so much more!

The truth is (and I realize I use this expression a lot).. it is scaring out there! And??exactly??like last year, same time of the year, I am still scared of myself. Scared I wont be strong enough to pull off the entrepreneurship life. The main obstacle to success is Yourself.

Note: It took me exactely 25min 08 sec. to write this post!

About Carole (code name 烤肉)

I work in tech since 2008, moved from Reunion island to Paris, Beijing, San Francisco and ended up in Berlin in 2014.
This entry was posted in Being an entrepreneur. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s