This year I really understood the meaning of leading by doing. Before I thought that leading was being reasonable, fair, and share with people a vision, motivation. And then magically people will follow. Then this year I had some very down moments, felt really lonely when realizing that people dont always follow. Maybe I did some stuff wrong, maybe it was a bad timing but I learn something very important. A leader can not expect the same dedication, the same passion than his own from anyone else.??
I spent too much time hoping and waiting. But finding someone as passionate as you is a blessing, if it even happens, enjoys it as long as it lasts, but this is not something you can expect. A leader accept to be the only one dancing in the crowd and have the drive from inside to keep him doing it when no one else is ready to believe the same.
The best you can do is to accept gratefully whatever people are willing to give you and do the rest.
Maybe by keeping your faith you will inspire people who will finally see what you see, believe in what you believe. But you can not count on it to keep walking. You have to keep walking anyway.
This year I also had what I would qualify as a "burn out". I am not sure 100% but I know I never felt so depressed ever before and that I kept me from working for several weeks. I learnt that being strong is not to never break, it is not to never be weak. Being strong is to accept your own weakness and limitation and stand back up again. Even in the hardest moment all you have to do is to be strong enough to not give up on everything. You can give up on something for a while and when things will go back up again (as they always do), then you will be able to continue whatever you were doing. It wont be as easy as if you never interrupted it, but it will be easier than the first time you did it. The important part is to start again, as reminds me my??favorite??poem – "if" from Rudyard Kipling:
If you can make one heap of all your winnings??
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,??
And lose, and start again at your beginnings??
And never breath a word about your loss;??
Everyone is looking for a deep sense of connectivity with others, it is the meaning of relationship. That is what make you feel alive. That is what allow you to impact or not. But relationships need time and maintenance. You have to be careful to always keep them alive with people who matters. With family or very good friends you might feel that we can spend several months, years without talking to them and still, when you meet again the feeling is the same. But the truth is more and more you will have gaps of knowledge about what happened in their life, and they in yours. It is not healthy to try to be too??independent. People CAN not be your priority, but they can not NEVER be your priority.??